That victory lap.
Some scribblings on the luminous time that is the emergence from depression.
A connection with something larger can emerge from a period of intense darkness and facing one’s demons.
I like to think of Spirituality as a deep connection from the self (a source of energy) to the universal energy source (the flow).
That's esoteric, I know. More on that in the future.
After a depression has passed through us, it’s common to feel the gaze shift from the past to the present and/or future. Hope sneaks back in. To do lists might activate. This being said, it’s important to do some kind of reflection on the depressed period once the veil has lifted.
For instance, after I emerged from my aforementioned melancholia — I realized that during my sadness, my mind kept wandering to a period of time in my life about ten years ago. This was a very complicated, intense, wonderful, and traumatic time for many reasons — of which I won’t get into at the moment. But, I often return there in my meditations and other quiet times.
This is important information!
Take note of the events, times, and places that your mind curls up around during a time of sadness. This is a guide. A serious clue.
I asked: What do I need to learn from that past time + place? What does my former self still need to teach me?
I imagined my former self and certain traumas that she went through. I also made a point to note any positive aspects, things that were occurring then that I enjoyed — that are not apart of my life now.
I took something concrete from the past: I used to draw. Currently, my art practice takes other forms. I drew often and loved the portability of it, the feel of it, and how it made my brain feel. So, I began to draw again in the now.
Something concrete taken from the past to the present.
Now, will I return to this younger me — will I continue to dwell in the past? Sometimes, sure. I will keep returning until I learn what I need to learn. Then I’ll be able to deactivate this very charged time.
This is the final installment of the Depression Groove series. Although, it’s a topic I feel very strongly about. So, I’ll return to it. Please write to me with questions, experiences, etc. Or, let’s connect during a Plain Alchemy Plan.
Listening to this album on repeat.
(Image: One of the first drawings I made post-dark-night. An emergence drawing.)